my only mistake is
Got off topic towards the end there, a little. But anyways. Just wanted to say I liked your response to that post. And I don’t plan on changing how I identify so it fits another persons definition anytime soon. ^_^ have a lovely day. Or night.
Thanks. I feel slightly pedantic when my definition of bisexual fits within this new definition, but I like it simple. I like for people to know what I mean when I say bisexual, not for it to be narrowed down to one of a dozen or so possible options.
And really, I can’t help but be incredulous that people want to add gender to sexual orientation. Things are getting too special snowflakey up in here. That detail is not necessary. My sexual orientation is supposed to read your mind? It’s not supposed to kick in until I ask you your gender? Nah, son. That ain’t how it works. Your sexual orientation should refer to sex, and then if gender matters to you, that doesn’t rise to the level of orientation. That’s just your “type”.
Sure thing, I can source just about anything I say. Here we go:
The Bisexual Manifesto, written in 1990
The lovely folks at the bisexual-community really lay out some superb documentation in this post, so I’m going to link you to it rather than claim any credit for that particular bit of research.
Another great resource list, this time specifically focusing on accepted definitions of bisexuality, this time from bialogue-group.
A sweet little screen shot of a poll that I grabbed from the charming singonkey.
Here’s a gem from another respected bisexual organization, bisexualindex.org .
But wait there’s more!
I’m sensing hostility…
See, the thing is, I feel like I’m the one being told I’m not defining my identity correctly. Based on having identified as bi for over 20 years and not hearing this until I got to Tumblr.
It seems, from the character of your comments, and all the linked material, that an attitude like mine comes from a cissexist place. It does not not. At least in my case. It just comes from my experience, and wondering what the heck pansexual is for if this is what bisexual means, and any number of liberal/progressive and open-minded or practical concerns.
Like isn’t it cissexist to not classify trans men and trans women as men and women? Like isn’t it then possible for a person to be nominally straight and identify as bisexual (I see now some of these sources don’t say ‘two or more genders”, but “your own and two or more other genders” so that fixes that). Like just plain believing that there’s nothing problematic with saying “both sexes” because it’s sexes, not genders.
And not least of all… Believing it’s unnecessarily complicating things to say that one’s sexual orientation must read the minds of others. Is that really how sexual orientation works? Because I thought it worked on sight. Your sexual orientation reacts to a body, and before your mind knows whats in their mind (what their gender is). I personally think bisexual covers all, so long as it has the “sexes” definition. And then if your boat is further floated by the details of gender, that distinction is at the level of a “type”, not a sexual orientation.
I fit the definition of pansexual. But bisexual is the word I grew up with, and I’m more apt to use that instead. And still I don’t really want the word changed on me unnecessarily, one manifesto written in 1990 aside. Coming up with a new word just feels polite. To me. And one has been come up with. So… I’m just like WHY when I hear this “two or more genders” thing. I’m sure that someone wrote 25 years ago that you didn’t have to be of African descent to be “black”, too. Doesn’t mean people who’ve identified as black their whole lives are not gonna bristle if Asians start using it.
Hiccup reached over, twisting the small knob just below the lightbulb, making the lamp two degrees brighter before the third twist turned it off. His book lay on the nightstand, corner jutting into thin air, with the frayed red ribbon he used as a bookmark dangling limply from between the pages. It had been five minutes since he had put the book away, and — tucked into bed as he was: cozy and bleary-eyed as his clock flashed 1:39 — he was ready to gently drift off to sleep.
Moonlight mixed with the glowing aura of the streetlights below still poured in from the large window on the far side of the room, which stayed open during the night and closed during the day; he loved having the light in his room, but the heat it brought with it made the whole apartment too hot. In the soft ambient light, he allowed his fingers to grasp his phone, pressing the power button at the top. The screen flashed into colour and light, the contrast too strong initially for Hiccup’s eyes; slowly he opened them, though already he could feel his eyelids rejecting the movement.
Unlocking his phone, Hiccup opened up Facebook, scrolling through his newsfeed as he waited for sleep to come. The words became easier to read as his eyes adjusted to the harsh, pure white light from the mobile. There was nothing of significant interest — random news clippings; posts of outdated internet memes that some were only just discovering for the first time; vague statuses and even vaguer comments. Hiccup was just looking at Rapunzel’s photos that she had uploaded from their trip to the zoo, when the screen dimmed and a text showed in the centre.
Jack: Hey babe.
Hiccup read over the text, but before he had a chance to respond, his screen shook again as a second text message arrived.
Jack: I’m really horny. Send me some nudes.
Hiccup read the text message, before letting out a deep breath.
"Jack are you serious?" He asked, turning his head on the pillow to face the white-haired boy resting just next to him, devilish grin on his face as he tried pointlessly to hide his phone. Hiccup just stared at the boy, eyes lidded from a mixture of exhaustion and unspoken sarcasm, and Jack continued to stare back, the corners of his mouth pulling tighter almost unnoticeably.
The tiredness made his mind lethargic, but before Hiccup was aware what had happened, Jack was on top of him, arms grabbing at his wrists, back arched and arms extended so that Hiccup could see all of the boy. In a frenzy of movement, Jack ripped the thick comforter from where it had been tucked under Hiccup’s arms, down to past his knees, and Jack pressed his lower half against Hiccup hard.
Their pyjamas did nothing to hide what Jack was clearly not ashamed of, and Hiccup’s mind came to full attention, sleep pushed to the corners of his mind as he could feel an aching hardness pressed into the crevice between his groin and hip. ”Oh, I meant every word of what I said, snowflake,” Jack purred into Hiccup’s ear, and Hiccup let out a soft moan before giving in, raking his fingernails down the sides of Jack’s back, pulling him closer so that he could feel him even more.
By the time the night ended, Jack had the pictures he had asked for.